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Not Rights, But The Right Thing To Do

I had a problem with a boy in class today. Once again, we see an athlete feeling entitlement without accountability, trying to get ahead, while actually falling behind. This young man is a very good person. He was texting in class, and he knew he wasn’t allowed to do so. His excuse was that he was texting his mom. I took his phone away. When he was walking by me later in the class .he asked if he could negotiate with me He was passing notes back and forth with the student next to him. I asked him to stop.
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                Gas prices are rising, an unpopular war is being waged, and we are seemingly inundated with messages that tell us to ignore long-term goals and to concentrate on me and today.  Some people respond with a paradigm shift in their thinking.  They stand up and say, “No” to this expensive, time-consuming pursuit of youth sports. 
Quality family time needs to be brought back to the forefront of our goals and desires.  We must regain the balance in our lives.  A sense of community, and what it stands for, needs
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                We tend to look around for the outrageous and the outlandish as a way to vent frustration about what’s happening in our own day to day existence. We can say, “Hey, I’m not so bad after all!” or “What a jerk that guy is!” but still pay attention to his or her behavior.  The athlete can be categorized in many negative ways.  But what we don’t understand is that when we do that, we are giving the athlete the attention he or she craves to fuel continued poor behavior.  It emboldens them.  Gives them the attention they
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I was recently talking to a high school football player.  His season was over and he commented about what went on with the new craze of 7 on 7.  He came to me asking what I thought he should do.

         I did not answer him directly.  What I did was inquire as to how much fun he had playing football this past season.  He said it was OK.  The team had done well, he started, but you could tell there was something missing.  I probed further.  He told me of a game where he was playing defensive back.  The
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Have you asked the kids if winning are why they play youth sports? WE HAVE! It's their sport. Here's what a majority answer. They play for fun! What is being advocated by many people is an extrinsic reward on a child’s internal development before they are fully developed. The test, winning a game, takes priority in terms of its importance to the child versus development?  Does the child who sits up first, crawls first, walks first, automatically become the fastest child? NO!

       Extrinsic rewards may help a few but when did we start teaching to the few. The rewards’
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Simply put, for 99% of the children, youth sports are not a vehicle for or a means to an end. It is not about status, glory, scholarships, or playing professional sports.  According to the National Alliance of Sports,   70% of our children quit playing youth sports by the time they are 13 who were still playing at the age of 10.  To get the fun back into youth sports, we need to balance the importance of youth sports and the time we spend on them, the effort we put into them, in proportion to the rest of our lives. This
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Here is a story about a young man being recruited to play college football. He was scheduled to take a test in his regularly scheduled class when a college recruiter showed up at his school. He wanted the student to ask his proctor if he could take the test later. The proctor said no. The Varsity football coach then came down to the room and started negotiating with the proctor on behalf of the college recruiter and of course the student athlete. The proctor agreed to let the young man leave for twenty minutes, but he had to come back
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            I was doing television broadcasting for a local high school basketball game at the varsity level. I enjoy doing play by play and adding a different perspective to the broadcast that includes recognizing on the air academic excellence and sportsmanship.What should have turned into a fascinating game between two rivals eventually eroded into a blowout in front of  a sold out gymnasium.
         Two cross town rivals going at it in front of a packed house. The atmosphere was electric even before the Junior Varsity game was over. High school games
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Here is an example of how “elite” youth sports teams actually mislead parents, coaches, and players into believing that they are being competitive at a high level at an early age. What is in fact happening is that the outcome (players leaving a sport) is predetermined to eliminate potentially good athletes. The deck is stacked to allow higher developed children more playing time at the expense of other children who start out more slowly, or whose families cannot afford to pay the high price of youth sports participation.
Competition can be enhanced for those who need more game experience and
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my daughter Molly Part 3

Molly Stanley
I've always considered myself to be more of a country girl at heart.
The city, with it's loud noises and constant disquiet, has never compelled me to stay.

People say we each have two homes.
One is your actual home, the one where you were born and raised.
The other is your spiritual home, the birthplace of your soul.
My actual home is here in the city of Rochester, barely a mile from where we are now.
I have lived in that house my whole life, and I can't imagine living anywhere else.
But my spiritual home?
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My daughter Molly Part 2

Molly Stanley
Inventory of Being
I am full of contradictions
I am made up of wishes and truths, sadness and joy
Anger and calm, kindness and cynicism
Fire and ice, dark and light
Hopes and despairs
I know what I like and don’t like
I love my family and friends, animals and imagination
I dislike the cold and carbonated drinks
I love music and dancing, warmth and laughter
I dislike math homework and early mornings
I know what I believe in, and I stand strong behind those beliefs
I believe being different doesn’t make you a
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my daughter Molly part 1

Molly Stanley
It usually starts with something.
An event, a trigger, a starting point.
One moment that replays in your mind like a broken record, the one moment you wish you were able banish to the recesses of your mind, never to be seen or heard from again.
I’ve searched for it, sifting through the few things I remember from childhood, recounting the stories my parents have told me about myself, the times in my life I no longer remember.
My insufficient memory took those from me, the memories of my carefree days, when joy was limitless, love
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English teacher with a chemistry major!

This is a story of a high school volleyball team. The players on the team were led by a coach and his staff who made it his philosophy to put team chemistry as a priority and a motivational model for his players. On the way to a state championship he vowed to make sure he got everyone of his players in a game, and he did just that, even the Junior Varsity players called up after their season was over.


 In one particular playoff game he put a boy in who had to serve. The young man blasted a
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The advantages of sitting on the bench and watching have been brought up to me on numerous occasions and I would like to address the issue. It is exponentially better to play than to sit on the bench. The example of Aaron Rodgers sitting on the bench learning from Brett Farve was used as an example. Let’s look at Aaron Rodgers stats from 2008 to 2011.
Year Team G Att Comp Pct Att/G Yds Avg Yds/G TD TD% Int Int% Lng 20+ 40+ Sck SckY Rate
 2011 Green Bay Packers 15 502 343 68.3 33.5 4,643 9.2 309.5 45
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TRIPLE A—Does that mean attitude, athleticism, and academics?  A recent conversation with some hockey players who were playing “Triple A” hockey at the Bantam level led me to this next blog. 
The children were adamant about both their ability to get a DI scholarship, and the proper path to take to receive the scholarship.  They would continue to play at their current level, which included not playing for their high school team, missing days of school to go to different tournaments, and playing as much as possible.
Let’s break it down.  First and foremost, just because
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Bob Salomans journey. ck it out!

It is amazing how one life could drastically change with hard work, a passion, and dedication. Three years ago, Bob Salomon was just a regular family man with a wife, two kids, and a full-time job as an officer for the state of New Jersey. While Salomon enters his 24th year on the job, these days you can also find him at the center of a unique movement with the commitment to making a difference. As the co-creator and driving force behind the children’s book, “A Glove of Their Own,” Bob has watched numerous organizations and foundations use his
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Basketball against the Zen:

There is a state championship team in basketball. They have multiple D1 athletes recruited in multiple sports. They are trying to recapture their former glory with one last run with the seniors who make up the bulk of their D1 ensemble. I have watched them play twice this year and have followed them intently.

            The first game I saw, they easily beat their opponent. In realty, the game was over by half time as they held a commanding lead. The coach subbed liberally and made sure all the players got into the game. However, after the game was over,
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hockey story

 This is a story about a high school hockey coach. I ran into this person when I was called to help a youth sports coach solve a problem on his team. While waiting for his team to come off the ice, I noticed this high school coach with a serious look on his face standing at the arena door, scowling. Previously, I had been told that he was a great guy and that everyone likes this guy. I was stunned when he spoke. He cursed the team practicing on the ice and cursed at them, saying they should get off
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Screamin memees

Yet another modified basketball game, and yet another example of what needs to be fixed in youth sports. In the grand scheme of things, it was one more meaningless game. Boys were playing basketball to have fun. They are not at home playing X-box or on their phones texting or staring at the computer. Both coaches were mindful of their players' playing time, their enjoyment in participating on a team, and just having fun.
  I purposefully sat close to the benches during the first half. I listened to the coaches talk to their players and everything was fine. The

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Unsportsmanlike Conduct:

Unsportsmanlike Conduct:
            A sectional championship soccer game was taking place before a packed stadium. Two rivals playing in front of three thousand people. A great day for all the players. In a hotly contested match, the winning team was substituting many players during the contest. They increased their lead with 10 minutes to go and emptied their bench. This team was made up of mostly players who played on their own town team. Most, if not all of their kids would get a chance to play in front of this packed house.
The other coach who had many “Club”
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